Dear Kay,
I spent this weekend at home with my family for the first time in what felt like an eternity! Friday evening I was picked up by my Dad, sister and her boyfriend from the campus. We arrived home to a beautiful table laid out by my mother and a home cooked lasagna. So many hugs and kisses were shared, with stories of our lives unfolding over wine and garlic bread. There was something new about the atmosphere in the house. An old sort of new. It was as though the entire home had let out the sigh it had been holding in for the last 6 months. I could sense a new, revived happiness about the place and the people it sheltered. I’m not sure if something had changed since I’d been home last or if I was just in a better brain space for this particular visit.
Saturday started off with a lazy breakfast, brought to me, with a cup of tea in bed, by my Dad. The three girls then piled into the car and hit the town, picking up any essentials and some fun pieces to decorate for Halloween. The only thing that Saturday lacked was a serious amount of study that I really needed to get done, but I don’t regret a second (I definitely will come Thursday when I have no time and nothing done!).
Sunday, as always, went by far too fast. My sister and I got up late and made ourselves some coffee and pancakes and spent the late afternoon chilling out. We then paid a visit to our Grandparents and before we knew it were being ferried back to the big city, where our individual lives would resume.
Last night was spent with Murphy for his pre-birthday celebrations. I spent yesterday evening making him, what I thought was, a cute card and wrapped his gorgeous new Filofax. It hasn’t been long since we’ve been dating so I was really at a loss as to what to buy him. I thought the cute little card would lighten things up a little. We headed out dancing in town and stopped for some food before we headed home. We spent most of the night chatting about our past and our experiences and what made us tick. I really enjoyed the conversation but wasn’t feeling great, still suffering from my monstrous cold. I was also too excited about giving him the thoughtful gift that I had sitting in my room! When he opened it, I felt a pang of despair as he took a quick look at the card I’d made and pushed it aside. I feel he did like the Filofax but not as much as I’d hoped. Did I just get it really wrong? Or am I wasting my time? It’s not that he was ungrateful, I just feel like he didn’t really know how to react in the situation. He is very awkward after all.
I’m still unsure as to how I feel about things with him. On the one hand, he’s so kind and sweet and takes care of me but on the other, I’d like if he was confident and could take control of situations. Maybe I’m wanting too much from him. I should give the poor boy a break.
- Mood: Confused!?
- Weight: 11st 4lb… grrr
- Health/Fitness: Sick as a dog, want to run! Might run anyway!
- Random thought: Popcorn smells like digestive biscuits (there’s someone eating popcorn beside me)
Anyway, that’s all I have for now.
Sending all my love,
E
Dear Kay... 